The question is simple: what is its value? If you are having difficulty or have not been able to answer, don’t worry, it happens very often. We usually find it much easier to assign values to others than to ourselves. Why does this happen? Self-esteem is built through positive and negative relationships from birth. The more loved and secure a child feels, the more likely he or she is to become a confident adult. On the other hand, a child who grows up hearing that he or she is not wanted, not capable, not smart, not beautiful, is likely to be an insecure adult, which will lead to difficulties in choosing a profession (I’m no good at anything), making friends (I’m not cool enough) and in dating (I’m not beautiful).
It is important to say that self-esteem is the internal value we have attributed to ourselves and has nothing to do with the external (physical), after all if this were the case only actresses and models would have good self-esteem. In fact, a woman may feel better if she is tidy, but that doesn’t mean she has to have self-esteem, because an insecure woman may be extremely vain (afraid of being judged by others) while another may leave the house without combing her hair and be super confident (I’m beautiful anyway).
The signs of low self-esteem are numerous and we can mention among them: need for approval (recognition and pleasure); dependence (financial and emotional); insecurity (jealousy); not being allowed to make mistakes, perfectionism; feeling of not being able to achieve anything; not believing in oneself or in anyone; constant doubts, doubting one’s own worth; depression; anxiety; envy; fear; anger; aggressiveness; complacency; shame; difficulty in developing professionally and feeling inferior.
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How to improve your self-esteem? There is no magic formula, the only solution is self-knowledge, we can compare our life to a messy wardrobe, where it is very difficult to find clean clothes (qualities), so we have to see which clothes need to be washed, which ones don’t fit anymore (get rid of the wounds that only weigh down and take up space in our life) and which ones are there brand new without ever being used (potential).
Although laborious, self-knowledge allows us to see things more clearly, to find our qualities, which are often suppressed and cancelled out by ourselves and by others. The first step is to want to change, to have difficulties, not to be ashamed to seek a professional. Be happy!